i didnt go to shcool today..my excuse was that my grandparents came from the states and i wanted to hang out wit them cuz i see them lyk once a year wen it really was i ddnt do my homework and school is fucked up..my grandparents really came tho..anyway..sometimes i feel lyk my only reason for goin to school is to see a certain someone..someone who means soooo much to me..someone who i mean soooo much to ..probly the sweetest person iv met...someone i love....she (now you know its a girl) gave me a bracelet yesterday and this note..the note was like the nicest..no IS the nicest note anyone's ever given me...m too lazy to go into details about that..i told her last night that id stay wit her the whole day that we'd be out at the same time at school cuz she ws feelin bad..but i ddnt go...demmit......i dont know anyone who ever loved me as much..sometimes i wonder if she's even human...like i'd wonder if she's an angel sent by God to teach me something...but i know shes human..cuz i saw her cry...i made her cry....and i still h8 me for that...now wen she crys cuz of me its a gud cry.i think...i hope she doesnt kill me for wrting this....i wonder if id ever find anyone who can give as much love as this girl gives to me...any mortal person i mean......shez one of the best thing to happen to me in this fucked up year.........she wants me to be something tho but i dont want to yet..m knda sad that i keep tellin myself'no..not yet...your not ready"...i hope im doing the right thing..i just dint think that rushing into this is worth ruining a beautiful relatonship like ours...i sang to her "i want to grow old with you"..if i really wanted to, then time wouldnt matter in that issue..it wouldnt matter how long it would take for me to become what she wants me to be if both of us would wana spent enernity with each othr..i hope you get what i mean...i wonder why the hell im writing this..this is what no school and a heavy breakfast does to you..m gna do pacework..bye