this is the 2nd time im saying this..no one calls my girl a bitch..and ill seriously kill you, rich, next time you call her that....im sori geri bout the other day..it was pretty messed up..i ddnt think id see you in the 1st place..it was kinda a last minute thing....hold on..i dnt really know what im blogging for..bogs are where we let out shit that builds up inside..this is more of a letter to somone who i love like hell...but anyway...im jus sori..im not mad anymore....if people started appriciating things more, tha world would be such a better place..like just seeing your face makes my life fulfilling..uh..m too tired to type or think anymore..ill come back some other time..bye

well...i went to school even tho its summer vacation..mostly cuz i was bored..i needed to get sumn ther..on the way ther geri textd and told me she was home alone and she was like "why dnt u come over" n stuff...she was kiddn..but i actually did go..anyway ill skip stuff...i had no way to go ther cuz i ddnt know how to commute ther..so i made my classmate bring me ther..but its kinda out of his way..but he did it any way..but on the way my clasm8 was like gettn mad cuz it was really out of his way n shit...and..well..imagine that ur mom is w8n for u to pick you up and your asshole friend is begging u to take him to his girlfriend's house that u dnt even know wer it it is and u dnt even have a pemanent licinse yet and you dno how long shit's gna take and all that junk...well thas probly wat he felt....then wen we get ther, i get off, say hi, she gets in the car, we buy sumn, go back to the spot wer we picked her up, i get off wit her n walk like a couple meters from the car then practically only look at her for the next 5 minutes till its time for us to go..i h8 time...i wish it'd stand still..i got kinda mad at her cuz i only spent that long with her and we ddnt even do anything...im kinda fucked up right now as u can tell....i talked to myself (yes. i actually talk to myself) and i asked "is it really necesary to get mad..is it really necesary to be pissed at her forever?" ..well its not right? ....im should stop complaining so much..i told her a wile ago that it made me so glad to have seen her today even if it was such a short time and it was kinda messed up...i wasnt really exoecting much anyway wen i was thinking of goin ther..and thats how it should be right? dont expect..just give people wat they want to expect....i dont expect her to love me each day or to agree with everythin i believe..but she does love me everyday...and i love her everyday..its like im blessed r sumn by it...i ges....am i making any sense...???? i need to work out my thoughts more clearly next time im blog...haha...bye

why the fuck duz it seem like evrything i say now ends up hurting someone..i never mean to hurt anyone..well most of the time at least...maybe i should just shut up...like ill never talk again..then i cant hurt anyone by saying somethin s2pid...

shAron stone has this strange habit of looking older or younger than she actually is...shes as old as my mother..goddammit..but she looked great om basic instinct 2..sharon stone that is...haha....im not sure why i wrote that...not sure why im blogging right now eithr...my sister's graduation is today..im w8n for my dad so we can leave for school....and i forgot what i was gona say..haha.typical me..bye....for now

for the past hour or so ive been tellin the people who asked me about my day that i walked with geri to our classm8's house out in the blazing sun...and she was complaining practically the whole way...sure it was a pain in the neck.but it was fun as hell..for us tho it may seem like just a small thing..and it kinda was..but we wer together..jus the two of us..two lovers in the heat of the boiling sun treking to somewhere that we leave 2 minutes after we get ther because everyone in the house is finished watching white chicks and wants to get back to school and..w8 thers no more and..uh..i spent most of the day with her...we played hangman and i proved to her that i do know her..she wrote the blanks and i guessed the answer without saying even one letter..hehe...cool...i dont feel like writing now..and for once..my brain is not fried

law of intimacy and commitment:

the amount of intimacy is directly proportional to the amount of commitment within a relationship...

cool...learned that today...me and my friend figured that out..i asked him what's the diff between being in a relationship and jus bein friend..now i know..today was the last day of school..but not the last official day..im goin back monday and tuesday to take a couple tests and practice singing for the graduation..i think..sux that people move on..like move away..i h8 separations..geri told me she might not be going to my school anymore next year...if not, then what the fuck is my reason for goin to school anymore..i was depressed for like half the day cuz of that..she also told me that she might move to the states...before we had this problem about me goin away to the states for college and that we'd fuckin miss each other n stuff...oh w8..that wasnt the problem..she told me she only found out bout me goin to the states for the summer recently and she was crying n stuff about it and she said i was acting like it was nothin..well it means sumn to me hon, though you already know that now..of corse i'll miss you wen i go for the summer..i want u want is for me to show that i care about it by crying then i'll do it..for you.....hehe...anyway..she said she might be goin to the states and the prob now was like it feels like shes the one that duznt seem to care about it...if she's ther and if wer still together wen im done wit collge, im moving to where she is..i cant stand bein away from her..i dont wana be separated by that big a distance..i want her...she says she wants me..i promised her that i'd do everything i can for this relationship to work out..she wants it to last till we get married..and im all for it as well........i ges i jus dont know what i'd do without her...........anyway..about the last day of classes...i was left at school while alot of the rest of the kids wer on a field trip..i ddnt make it to the honor roll kc....this duznt have anything to do with the topic, but if anyone is reading can you tell me how to change the colors anf font in the blog cuz i forgot for some strange reason...anyway.....what was i saying..oya..dnt make it to the honor roll..i wrote a note to myself to do better next year...i think im graduating..yeah i probobly am..uh..shit i wrote alot...uh...duh...bleh...whe....dammit..my brain needs a rest....gbye

i meant to stay on the computer for like 5 minutes but now im sucked into this paradox of the world wide web and have no intent to relieve myself of this enslavement and return to an abnormaly normal life...good lord that was cool..i have this habit now of annoying my friend who calls me her best friend by thinking up the most pervertedly perverted things to think up that a pervert would do and do it to her..liek i see her sitting and she's not even doing anything then i look at her then give her this look then she gets so annoyed..haha..dno if this is making any sense..i ddnt describe it very well...why the hell am i saying all this?....i think i need to take some depressants or something so i'll calm down...buhbye

i think shes mad at me...i was sitting with her then she had to leave...then my "ex" walked over to me..then geri walked back for some reason..probly cuz she saw luiza walk over to my direction..or she was gna say i love you one last time...well somin made her walk back...now i kinda wish she didnt..so she wouldnt have had to see lu..she gets jealous easy....geri, i jus want you to know (again=|..) that i love you...and only you..no one is replacing you..luiza is past now..you're my present..and hopefully my future....im not saying to stop bein jealous..at least i know u love me enough to be jealous...im sayin to trust me..jus know that i love you..iflou remember?....uh..idno wat else to say about this..i jus hope ur not mad at me hon..i still wana call YOU hon...okie?

hi..you suck..