shit's happend..and i did it again.. i opened up my stupid mouth and let out beehive of words that would cause a girl to stay up all night crying.. God im a fuckin idiot.. i need to learn when to keep my mouth shut.. thers something wrong with me.. its like a part of me wanted to break up with her.. that part of me didnt wana be treated the way she treats me anymore.. she ignores me.. she leaves me when there's other people around.. i forgot what the other thing was about her that i ddnt like, but anyway, i think a part of me just didnt want to be treated that way by her anymore..bsides i ddnt even think she deserved me.. and for some strange reason, i though it best to tell her that a part of me wanted to break up with her.. fucker. how could i have been so stupid.. maybe i thought that it'd be better that she'd hear it from me instead of from someone else.. i made her cry....again.. she thought i was really gona break up with her.. what kind of boyfriend am i? she certainly doesnt need another boyfriend that just makes her cry..... yet she sees something in me..i still dont really know what the fuck it is about me...but she wants me..she wants to stay with me.. she wants us to last until we're like old and cant remember what highschool we went to or where our car keys are..i kinda want that too.. i think we're alright now..i talkd to her explaining that im not breaking up with her..i hope things are patched up for now.. this sux cuz when we werent together we'd never fight and now its like we cant go a week without fighting..and we practically end each day pissing each other off or something... are these just tests or something to help strenghtn our relationship? i love her..and if im gona have to live thru these fucked up tests ill do it to be with her..ill do a million of those tests and pass them so i can make her happy.. ...i just want things to be better for both of us..