blah blah..blog blog..i ddnt get much done in school...pretty fucked up day..its always fucked up in my school tho..i think i think to much..das probly why ihardly get anything done..i think to much about sumn instead of doin it..im an uncle..wla lang

wat happnd today..i felt sorta like a dad...dont really feel lyk explaining how..it just involved a puppy..at least one person knows what im talking about....why is life so long..why do we have change..i hate change..why do people move on...why if love so complicated..why do we have to look for perfection..why weren't we jus born with it...why am i writting this

well today was messed..i lookd like shit the whole day..my teacher caught me writing a note to this girl..then she made me talk to the girl..the note was like sayin that she duznt appreciate anythin i do..dammit..i cant xplain it properly ryt now..blah..

chek this out..


video provided by pen

havent written a decent blog here in a while..ive bee..uh..confused l8ly...tierd of life..nothing different..itz typicall of me to be tired of life..i dont know where im headed..m knda more worried about were my friends are headed more than wer im headed in life...this blog sux so far..uh..demmit..now what...les see.......i was at conventtion the other week..remember when i started this blog i wrote that i gave my essay writing event to this other guy so he could go to ocnvention?the kid got 4th place...he placed dammit..that shudve been mine..whyd i have to be so nice...ahhgghhh...anyway that's my event nxt year...itz not a total loss...i got 3 1st place medals..7 medals total...blahblah..i felt alone today..i was spozed to go out n watch a movie wit kat but her relatives dont like me...actually she said her tita ddnt allow her and she said her tita and lola wer both criticizing me..they dnt lyk me..they think i lyk kat or sumn..mb cuz m the only guy that hangs wit her at church or whatever...i dont see that as a reason for them not to lyk me..im nice..i think.....thers a girl at school whos bin getn on my nerves l8ly..she judges people before knowin them..sayz stuff to her friends dat aint tru...gets into eveyones business..dumps her friends cuz of one thing she duznt lyk about them..n frikin imature...i wish love..and life werent such backstabbin bitches..i told that to someone..that same someone imagined me in a coffin..weird..
uh..das all..

i know this story..i put it here but i dont remember exactly how it goes so bear wit me...

this guy was out fixin his car engine when he heard a scratching noise coming from the side of the car. he went to see what was happenin only to find his 5-year-old son scratching out things in the side of the car. out of his rage and without thinking, the dad took the wrench he was holding and whacked the kid in the hand. when he had realized what he had done he saw that he had cut open his son's hand and his fingers were bleeding lyk hell. in the hospital later that day, the son asked his dad, "daddy, will i ever be able to use my fingers again?" he couldnt answer. he just broke down and sobbed. then he ran out to his car to get some fresh air..and saw the scratches on the car spelling out I LOVE YOU DADDY

our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond our measure. it is our light, not out darkness that most frightens us. your playing small does not serve the world. there is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. we were all meant to shine, as children do. it's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. and as we let out own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. as we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

i still think this was crap..this is how bord i get in class..annyyyway


take me to a place where love can breed
away from chaos and misery
take me farther than i've ever been
a place found perhaps from within
a place where our hearts will bond
a place of which i shall grow fond
a word of transgress i leave behind
to a place where thou is mine
a place that we can call our own
for where your heart is...it is my home


so now wat..